Funny & Enlightening Stories

Nasrudin was throwing handfuls of crumbs around his house.

"What are you doing?" someone asked him.

"Keeping the tigers away." Nasrudin replied

"But there aren't any tigers within thousands of miles of here"

Nasrudin replied "That's right. Effective, isn't it?"

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A farmer had only one horse, and one day the horse ran away. The neighbors came to condole over his terrible loss. The farmer said, “What makes you think it is so terrible?”

A month later, the horse came home–this time bringing with her two beautiful wild horses. The neighbors became excited at the farmer’s good fortune. Such lovely strong horses, how fortunate you are! The farmer said, “What makes you think this is good fortune?”

A month later the farmer’s son was thrown from one of the wild horses and broke his leg. All the neighbors were very distressed. Such bad luck! The farmer said, “What makes you think it is bad?”

A month later a war came, and every able-bodied man was conscripted and sent into battle. Only the farmer’s son, because he had a broken leg, remained. The neighbors congratulated the farmer, how blessed you and your son are. “What makes you think this is good?” said the farmer.

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A fisherman was lying in the sun on a beach, dozing. He had finished his fishing for the day; he had had his lunch, and now it was time for his rest.

A businessman noticed him lying down lazily, and asked, "Why are you not at work today?"

"I have finished my work. I went out in my little boat this morning, caught some fish, sold some, cooked and ate some; now it is time to rest, time for my siesta", said the fisherman.

"But you could catch more fish couldn't you?" asked the business man.

"Why should I do that?" asked the fisherman in surprise.

"Then you could have some more money, buy a bigger boat with an engine which would carry much larger nets and catch even more fish," replied the businessman.

"Why?" asked the fisherman.

"Well then you can have a fleet of boats, set up a company, and when it's successful, you can sell it and make lots of money," said the businessman.

"Then what?" The fisherman was at a loss.

"Then you can lie on the beach without any worries, forever" insisted the businessman.

"But I am doing exactly that now. I am having my siesta. I have no worries about the future. I am happy, very happy. I have enough and enough is enough for me. I am blessed with the sea and the sunshine and plenty of time to enjoy life. Why would I go to all that trouble?"

The businessman, at first speechless, soon went away smiling.

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You live in illusion and the appearance of things. There is a reality, but you do not know this. When you understand this, you will see that you are nothing. And being nothing, you are everything. That is all.

Kalu Rinpoche

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Since everything is none other than exactly as it is,

one may well just break out in laughter.

Long Chen Pa

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People commonly feel that because I am considered a living Buddha I must experience only serenity, perpetual happiness, and have no worries. Unfortunately this is not so. As a high lama and incarnation of Enlightenment I know better.

Kanju Khutush Tulku Rinpoche

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Once a young professor was making a sea voyage. He was a highly educated man with a long tail of letters after his name, but he had little experience of life. In the crew of the ship on which he was travelling was an illiterate old sailor. Every evening, the sailor would visit the cabin of the young professor to listen to him lecture on many different subjects. He was very impressed with the learning of the young man.

One evening as the sailor was about to leave the cabin after several hours of conversation, the professor asked, "Old man, have you studied geology?"

"What is that, sir?"

"The science of the earth."

"No, sir, I have never been to any school or college. I have never studied anything."

"Old man, you have wasted a quarter of your life."

With a long face the old sailor went away. "If such a learned person says so, certainly it must be true," he thought. "I have wasted a quarter of my life!"

Next evening again as the sailor was about to leave the cabin, the professor asked him, "Old man, have you studied oceanography?"

"What is that, sir?"

"The science of the sea."

"No, sir, I have never studied anything."

"Old man, you have wasted half your life."

With a still longer face the sailor went away: "I have wasted half my life; this learned man says so."

Next evening once again the young professor questioned the old sailor: "Old man, have you studied meteorology?’

"What is that, sir? I have never even heard of it."

"Why, the science of the wind, the rain, the weather."

"No, sir. As I told you, I have never been to any school. I have never studied anything."

"You have not studied the science of the earth on which you live; you have not studied the science of the sea on which you earn your livelihood; you have not studied the science of the weather which you encounter every day? Old man, you have wasted three quarters of your life."

The old sailor was very unhappy: "This learned man says that I have wasted three quarters of my life! Certainly I must have wasted three quarters of my life."

The next day it was the turn of the old sailor. He came running to the cabin of the young man and cried, "Professor sir, have you studied swimology""

"Swimology? What do you mean?"

"Can you swim, sir?"

"No, I don’t know how to swim."

"Professor sir, you have wasted all your life! The ship has struck a rock and is sinking. Those who can swim may reach the nearby shore, but those who cannot swim will drown. I am so sorry, professor sir, you have surely lost your life."

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Once I asked Mulla Nasruddin, "How many years have you been married, Nasruddin?"

He said, "Twenty odd years."

So I asked, "Why do you call them odd"?

He said, "When you see my wife you will understand."

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